If It Doesn't Kill You, It Makes You Stronger

When to Write, And Where

2009-07-15T22:59:38Z

I’ve been listening to Garrison Keillor’s audiobook Homegrown Democrat, based on his 2004 book, in the car on my way to and from work. It’s reminded me one of my favorite pastimes is writing – and how little of it I actually do.

My problem lately is I want notification of an update to go into Facebook as well. This doesn’t seem like a major problem relative to everything else that goes on in the world, but I would like my blog updates to be reflected there somehow. It can be done, but one must be logged into both Facebook and Live Journal simultaneously – and Facebook is blocked at my office, where I do most of my writing. (One mind wanders when sitting behind a desk.) I’ll probably do some entries during the day, more at night – the better to do a “hey, look at me!” type of thing.

Anyway. One of the things Keillor points out is how much he enjoys going to the local café to write, read, or people watch. I can see enjoying that. Keillor lives in St. Paul, MN, population 287,151. I live in Naperville, IL, population 147,779. They sound similar, but they’re not, in that maybe 10 percent of Naperville’s homes are actually within realistic walking distance of its beautiful downtown.

Naperville’s a big city, but we are spread out. For us, a walk downtown would take a couple of hours, by which time we’d likely take a taxi back home before doing anything else. We do have a small strip mall within a 10 minute walk of our house, but there’s very little in the mall worth walking to – a convenience store, Convenient Food Mart, with a gas pump outside and a selection and occasional faint aroma inside that usually makes me think it’s better to buy what I’m after elsewhere. Zeppe’s Italian Market, which is what it claims to be, and has no tables. And a pizza place that had not-great pizza the one and only time we went. It would be a great place for a small coffee shop, but there are businesses you’d never expect there, like floor tile, and a dentist office, and a Curves – which probably has little space to actually exercise.

So we settle for the strip malls along Washington Street, which are about a mile away. There’s the takeout-only Chinese place, and the takeout-only Domino’s, and the takeout-only Jake’s Pizza. There’s Crème de la Crumb, a breakfast and lunch only restaurant with okay food and the ambiance of a nursing home cafeteria. There’s Scarpacci’s, which I have not yet tried, because it has no web site, no reviews, and looks more like a catering place, but does promise pizza by the slice. There’s Big Apple Bagels, which is a standard bagel place in a city that has a lot of them. (At least they’re better than the bagels in Durham, NC, which made me long for New York more than I thought I would.) There’s Gino’s East, which is acceptable but not nearly as good as Lou Malnati’s, and certainly not as good as Brooklyn pizza by the slice. There is a TCBY, of which Danny noted, “This isn’t bad, actually,” during his trip yesterday.

Since there are no true places where one can sit and linger for awhile, if I get the urge, I may have to settle for Dunkin Donuts, which just opened a location, to the delight of my son. The day after we got back from Cambridge, the two of us walked there – well, I walked; he used his Razr scooter – and he got a marble doughnut (blue icing with red stripes, for the 4^th of July). The next night, Karen, Danny, and I walked, after I told Danny he should use the bathroom before we left, which he declined to do. Halfway through the walk, he said, “I have to go to the bathroom,” and then made a show of collapsing every 75 yards or so in agony. By the time we were close, we switched our original destination of TCBY to Dunkin Donuts, knowing the latter had a bathroom. We got there, with Danny rushing up to the counter to check out all the doughnuts before I dragged him off to do God’s work.

I don’t particularly want to make Dunkin Donuts my home away from home, and perhaps it would make more sense to find a café with less than the 6,400 locations DD boasts. There’s a place called The Fat Bean Bistro, or something like that, about a five minute drive from our house. But I want to do more writing – preferably not necessarily from my cubicle.

Well, This Has Been a Day

2009-06-26T00:06:18Z

In fact, this has been a week. We've lost three major figures in the entertainment world in the last few days: Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, and Michael Jackson.

I don't have a lot to say about McMahon, because I didn't see a lot of him. Didn't see any of the 1960s game shows he hosted -- I know I should remember him hosting Concentration, because I remember Hugh Downs, but somehow I wasn't watching those few months. Almost never saw him on The Tonight Show, because I didn't stay up that late when I was a kid, and it wasn't my style when I was older. He was the genial guy with the booming voice. Still, he did quite well for himself -- tons of television appearances, a supporting role in a sitcom after Johnny Carson retired, gigs with Dick Clark and Jerry Lewis. It takes a good guy to be able to work with so many different personalities and not let your ego get in the way. I hope nobody remembers those Cash for Gold spots from earlier this year -- remember The Tonight Show and the Bloopers stuff instead.

***

Farrah's a different story. The first time I saw her was in Logan's Run, where she had a small role that got blown up once Charlie's Angels happened (I believe she was listed on the theater marquee the night I saw it above Michael York and Jenny Agutter. She'd done a ton of guests spots on TV shows and the odd movie (in one case, Myra Breckinridge, a really odd movie), but Charlie's Angels was what really got her career going. That, and the poster. Every boy aged 12-17 had it, including me (and Farrah wasn't even my favorite Angel; that would have been either Kate Jackson or Cheryl Ladd, depending on the era).

After she left the show after the first year, not so much. She did a Playboy cover that was kind of a bluff -- she'd posted for the cover scantily clad and there was an article written about her (she was interviewed, but it wasn't a Playboy interview), but no pictures that made you go "Whoa!" -- those came much, much later. A few real bad movies, and then some daring good ones. She was also involved with Ryan O'Neal for a real long time, which I hope made her happy -- I don't think it helped her career, or his. I did watch a couple of episodes of their 1991 sitcom Good Sports, which was kind of like Moonlighting might have been on a bad day. She did some good stuff later on (I really should watch Dr. T and the Women someday), and some weird stuff (I wish she didn't let herself get talked into doing Playboy). Like McMahon, she was ill for a very long time, and I hope she's at peace now.

***

And Michael -- obviously, no one saw this one coming, although like Elvis, he left us young. The Jackson 5 was my first favorite band; my first three LPs were all J5 albums (Greatest Hits, Diana Ross Presents, Maybe Tomorrow), and I still have all three. (Almost sold them all at a garage sale in 1980 but reconsidered and let The Osmonds and Partridge Family go instead.) Bought the albums, watched the cartoon (very disappointing make the connection years later than the voice of Berry Gordy was the same as Santa Claus in Frosty the Snowman, and it wasn't the actual Berry Gordy), watched the TV series a few years later. I was the first guy at my fraternity to spring for Off the Wall (even though I will never like "Don't Stop Till You Get Enough") and Thriller.

After that, though, it was too much Michael, and too much for him. I'm one of the people who thinks no one ever told him, "Uh, Michael, that's a really bad idea" except his dad, who no longer held sway at some point. When you're anointed the King (of Pop), you do what you want, even if it turns out that having a gigantic ranch with a Ferris wheel and live animals might be a bit of a cash drain. His albums after Thriller all suffered from the inevitable comparisons and "disappointing" sales (there was nothing like Thriller in terms of album sales, and likely never well be, plus it's been a good catalogue album). He was planning a series of concerts in London, but obviously we're left wondering what those would have been like.

That's a lot of day for today. Maybe we'll have a normal day tomorrow.

The Universe Is In Agreement

2009-05-19T17:49:17Z

Or at least two columnists: <A HREF="http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2009/writers/joe_posnanski/05/19/carlos.beltran/index.html">Joe Posnanski in <I>Sports Illustrated</I></A> and <A HREF="http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/2009/05/18/2009-05-18_steve_phillips_leaves_bat_on_shoulder_in_espns_sunday_night_baseball_booth.html">Bob Raissman in the <I>New York Daily News</I></A> agree ESPN analyst Steve Phillips doesn't know what he's talking about.

Phillips became general manager of a team on the rise in 1997 and left a train wreck in 2003. How ESPN decided he's an expert is completely befuddling, and the points made here help to sharpen my opinion a bit.

So Much for MannyBall

2009-05-07T16:15:12Z

Manny Ramirez gets a fifty-game suspension for failing a drug test.

And sales of the Scott Boras Dart BoardTM just increased 45 percent in Southern California.

Mets and the Cubs catch a break, as they'll play half their games against the Dodgers this year during the suspension.

I assume there's no room for appeals here, right?

Ripped From Today's Headlines!

2009-05-06T23:02:07Z

Interesting that Bristol Palin is now saying abstinence is the only way to go for teenagers three months after she said it was "not realistic at all." That'll teach her to go off the talking points, I guess. (She now claims that was taken out of context, which I now deem the new official substitute phrase for, "Oh shit, did I actually say that aloud?" You can't say you were misquoted when YouTube has it all over the place. The record for gall on this goes to Charles Barkley, who once claimed to be misquoted in his own autobiography.)

I feel badly for Bristol Palin, who's likely being marched all over the country to give her mom more credibility. My question is, what does it matter? The woman already has had a baby -- she may say now that abstinence is the way to go, but that ship sailed over a year ago. (By the way, here's a pretty good column in Salon from the last time Bristol was marched in front of the cameras, including a clip of the interview.) It's very tough what they're dealing with, but the problem is their take on it: yes, we shouldn't have had sex, but we did, and isn't it marvelous that we decided to keep the baby, and we have such a terrific family, everybody's so supportive -- but we want to make sure you don't have that choice, even if your family situation is horrible. It's so convoluted I wish Bristol Palin would be allowed to be just a mom for awhile, but I don't think that's going to be happen.

Actually, my problem is with teenage celebrities who are being asked about their virginity. They're basically being asked to make a no-sex-until-marriage pledge (Miley Cyrus apparently has taken one). I know in the past, Brooke Shields, Britney Spears, and Jessica Simpson all took similar pledges, with the admission (years later) that both Shields and Spears both didn't follow through. (I haven't heard anything to indicate Simpson broke her pledge, however.) The thing is, teenagers shouldn't have to make such a pledge -- my memory is my hormones were so nuts at that age, it would have been tempting to have sex with anyone. (I did resist temptation, however, when it seemed inappropriate. Maybe I should hit the talk show circuit.)

If I had a daughter who was making this tour and someone asked that, I'd have her turn the tables. "Well, I haven't decided that yet, but that brings up a good point, because I'm asking people about their experiences so I can be better informed when I make my decision. So, tell me: when did you lose your virginity, before or after marriage, and what was it like?" Let's see someone on CNN or Fox squirm a little.

False Headlining?

2009-05-02T16:44:11Z

I got caught up in the Bowl Championship Series congressional hearings yesterday. This article did it to me. The story itself is pretty straightforward -- if the NCAA doesn't do something soon, our government will. (And before someone says "Don't they have better things to do?" the answer is, each congressman and senator sits on different committees having to do with different governmental branches -- interstate commerce, environmental issues, foreign affairs, etc. A congressman can't just decide which committee he's going to be with; she or he is assigned at first, and can switch around as they get seniority. But they specialize in those assignments.)

Anyway, Rep. Joe Barton (R-TX) is one of the ones leading this fight, and I suspect a playoff will have to be legislated into existence, because it's clear the major conference leaders will be happy to scream "Screw you, we make more money this way!" at the public until that happens. But that's not the point. Eleven paragraephs or so down, Barton notes that attempts to tinker with the BCS would likely fail, as they have in the past. He said, "It's like communism. You can't fix it."

Now, to me, that's an apt comparison. He didn't say, "It's like communism. It's run by the state, and all the money comes to the state, and they kill millions of people, and the people will eventually rise up, and blah blah blah." He said "You can't fix it." You could say the same thing about the crappy CD clock radio that I literally ripped up (yes, literally -- I take my anger out on inanimate objects, not people) and threw in pieces into the dumpster a week after buying it. It was horrible. Couldn't be fixed; twenty-dollar clock radios are not worth taking into the shop. That's fine.

The headline on Yahoo: "Congressman compares BCS to communism," and that's what at least one news broadcast (Keith Olbermann's Countdown, which usually knows better) worked from. That's a load of horse hockey. The issue is either fixing -- or busting -- the BCS, and now it's become an accusatory thing.

Odd that I'm defending a Republican, huh? It happens sometimes, kiddies. I mean, it'll never happen for Michele Bachmann, but still....

Don't Count Your Chickens....

2009-05-01T18:13:25Z

With the impending retirement of Justice David Souter from the Supreme Court, the fights are already on over his successor. It's pretty much the whim of the President; unless someone is utterly unqualified or their name rhymes with Dork, they're going to be approved.

However, presidents are sometimes surprised by what happens to their nominees once they get on the court. The most obvious is Earl Warren, but there are quite a few others as well -- in both directions. Here's my list of appointments since FDR's era and which way they ruled (in general).

I Wish They All Could Be California Girls... No, Wait

2009-05-01T16:30:16Z

The National Organization for Marriage, which is opposed to allowed gay people to legally marry, has created a TV spot featuring Miss California Carrie Prejean</a>. You'll remember Prejean said at the Miss USA Q&A session last week she was against gay marriage, which may have hurt her chances of winning.

The first paragraph of this article hit the same chord I thought of when I saw the headline of the story:

After failing to stop recent gay marriage approvals in several states, opponents have found an attractive, telegenic poster woman in Miss California, a move reminiscent of beauty queen Anita Bryant's 1970s crusade against gay rights.

Good idea -- copy Anita Bryant's career plan. Let's see how well that works out for you.

Draft Wrapup

2009-04-27T15:59:18Z

As usual, I hope the Jets knew what the heck they were doing in the draft. I am not confident Marc Sanchez is the guy -- he seems a bit small, and goodness knows he should have stayed at USC another year. But they wanted him, they went out of their way to get him, and it's better to make the trade and be wrong than to not make the trade and be right. (By the way, the Redskins have fallen short in both the Jay Cutler and Sanchez derbies, which points to a tense year up the road.) As for Shonn Greene, I was surprised the Jets got him, but he's got to grow up a bit (he missed 2007 at Iowa due to academic issues; I don't know if that means he's a slow learner or doesn't focus on studying, but neither answer is a good one). A #3, a #4 and a #7 might have been a bit much -- I don't worry about the 7 (that's basically free agent level anyway, and it's a crapshoot), but the Jets have gotten a lot of successful players in the 4 spot.

By the way, I like the idea of picking a QB somewhere between 2 and 6 every year or so. The Packers always did this even when Brett Favre was at his peak; thus, if he got hurt they'd be okay, and they had some time to train his successor. Here's the list of QB's they've drafted since Brett came on the team:

Ty Detmer, Round 9, 1992
Mark Brunell, Round 5, 1993
Jay Barker, Round 5, 1995
Kyle Wachholtz, Round 7, 1996
Ronnie McAda, Round 7, 1997
Matt Hasselbeck, Round 6, 1998
Aaron Brooks, Round 4, 1999
Craig Nall, Round 5, 2002
Aaron Rodgers, Round 1, 2005
Ingle Martin, Round 5, 2006
Brian Brohm, Round 2, 2008
Matt Flynn, Round 7, 2008

Look at the 1990s -- the Pack drafted a QB every year but one between 1992 and 1999. Of that group, you have your share of owls ("Whooo?"), but you've also got Mark Brunell, Matt Hasselbeck, and Aaron Brooks, all of whom became pretty successful NFL QBs. The Packers got away from that in the 2000s -- they only drafted one QB over five drafts between 2000 and 2004 -- and that may be one reason they took both Brohm and Flynn last year. (My understanding is Flynn is actually way ahead of Brohm on the depth chart.)

If the #1 guy is still doing well, but the guy behind him develops, you can flip them for draft picks. Mark Brunell barely played for Green Bay, but he was traded for a #3 and a #5, and became a Pro Bowler in Jacksonville. Hasselbeck went to Seattle with a #1 (#17 overall) and a #7 for a #1 (10th overall) and a #3. (No idea who Brooks went for; he might have been let go.) And these guys barely played during the regular season (if at all) because they were behind Brett Favre.

Back to the Jets. They now have Kellen Clemens, Sanchez, and Erik Ainge, who missed all of last year with a foot injury and was suspended for violating the league's steroid policy. I'd be looking for a veteran, if there's one still available not named Rex Grossman, and look at the vet or Clemens to start the first half of the season while Sanchez develops. (This will be especially important if Sanchez isn't signed early.) There's really nothing out there (Grossman's the most experienced of the bunch), so I don't know if they'll bite the bullet on Grossman, or go dumpster diving in Clemens can't cut it.

Lesson Learned

2009-04-22T14:08:47Z

From now on, I self-check and pack my own bags at the supermarket. Apparently I left a bag behind last week -- my fault, not the checker's. Nothing huge (a pack of razor blades and a Renuzit stick for the second bathroom/cat litter box room, so far), but still annoying. I never do that when I check and bag myself.

Of course, I had Danny with me, so I was probably rushed.

A Correction

2009-04-21T18:45:31Z

Sports Illustrated, which a couple of weeks ago made a big deal of an NFL combine report which may have shown top prospect B.J. Raji had failed a drug test, now says they were mistaken.

Now, if the kid slips from, say, fifth to twelfth on draft day as a result, will SI make up the difference in what he would have made?

calliaume @ 2009-04-15T17:43:00

2009-04-15T22:45:22Z

Headed home soon. Apparently there is, or was, a tea bag thing somewhere in Naperville; I don't know where (Naperville's a pretty big city). Haven't decided whether to avoid it or drive by with my Jon Stewart quote "I believe you are confusing tyranny with losing," on my windows.

Have to do some house cleaning tonight; Karen and Danny are here tomorrow.

I haven't been on here as much; I've been trying to post from home since Facebook picks up my posts (it doesn't here, since it's blocked). I'll try to get here a little more often.

Wow

2009-04-02T23:45:07Z

They got him.

Okay, Jay. Be humble, work hard, and you could be the biggest athlete in Chicago since Michael Jordan.

Busy Day

2009-03-31T16:07:43Z

I'm in the office for an extended period of time today (big, massive project that I need to get off my desk tomorrow, so I can work on the smaller projects). Two things I have to do when I've got a 12-14 hour day ahead: 1. Not eat a lot of junk food. I did this yesterday (following a trip to Dollar Tree), and I felt gross and full by 4 PM. (There's a reason I haven't eaten a Mallo Cup in 35 years, it turns out.) Today, I've got two microwavable meals, an apple and an orange, a cup of yogurt, a bag of baby carrots, and some OJ. I should be okay. 2. Have music to listen to. We have two practical limitations to how we can listen to music here: nothing over the Internet (slows down the server), and nothing too loud (to avoid disturbing others), which eliminates CDs on the computer. So, I have a $10 cassette/AM/FM box. We also have one building-imposed limitation: no one can get more than four radio stations anywhere in the building: two news/talk, one Spanish-language, one religious. So I've got a pile of cassettes -- but do note I haven't made a cassette since 2000 (when I started burning CDs). So most of my cassettes were made between 1982 and then -- and reflect my college tastes (and a few years after). Here's what I grabbed for today: THE MOODY BLUES: Days of Future Passed/SANTANA: Zebop! THE ALAN PARSONS PROJECT: Eye in the Sky/THE ALAN PARSONS PROJECT: Pyramid THE WHO: Who's Next/FLEETWOOD MAC: Mirage CHICAGO: Chicago's Greatest Hits/JAMES TAYLOR: James Taylor's Greatest Hits RUPERT HOLMES: Pursuit of Happiness/RUPERT HOLMES: Partners in Crime MARVIN GAYE: All the Great Hits (compilation)/LINDA RONSTADT: Get Closer ANITA BAKER: Rapture/DAVID SANBORN: As We Speak ELTON JOHN: To Be Continued, Disc 4 ELVIS COSTELLO: Trust/ELVIS COSTELLO: Armed Forces Dr. Demento Presents the Greatest Novelty Records: Vol. IV The 1970's/SIMON & GARFUNKEL: Simon & Garfunkel's Greatest Hits R.E.M.: Automatic for the People/STEVIE RAY VAUGHAN & DOUBLE TROUBLE: In Step That should keep me busy through the rest of the day. VARIOUS ARTISTS: Superhits '70 (compilation)

Keep On Movin'

2009-03-12T11:12:49Z

I’m convinced we won’t see much expansion in professional sports over the next fifteen years or so. It’s due to current economic conditions, and most major metropolitan areas have teams.

But you will see some moves. Let me give the National Football League as an example.

Los Angeles – the second largest metropolitan area by population in the country – has no NFL team. And, oddly, they weren’t able to pluck an expansion team in the last few years, either. Part of this is the area is such a great place for college football, with USC and UCLA, that there’s less call for pro teams. And it could also use a football-only stadium. I’m guessing somebody will pull it off – but I think this may be the one metropolitan area that will have to wait until the next expansion.

San Francisco/Oakland, on the other hand, has two teams, the only metro area to do so, except New York. That will probably not change. I read an article recently where the city managers are following very carefully the developments in New Jersey, where the Giants and Jets are building a stadium that is a total share, and will look like a Giants stadium for Giants games and a Jet stadium for Jets games – not like a Giants stadium with a few green banners. The problem here is Oakland’s ownership situation, under Al Davis, is one of the worst in the NFL, and San Francisco’s isn’t far behind. They may not be willing to make the compromises necessary to share a stadium – and a shared stadium is almost a must at this point.

Riverside/San Bernardino, also in southern California, doesn’t have a team, but I don’t expect that to change; they’re close enough to Los Angeles that they’ll likely share.

Portland, Oregon, at 23rd place, is the next unoccupied area, and I could see them luring a franchise in the right circumstances. Autzen Stadium, on the University of Oregon campus, could probably be used for a couple of years; Oregon State University is closer, but the stadium doesn’t seat enough people to satisfy NFL standards.

The next few areas with no team: Sacramento, Orlando, San Antonio, and Las Vegas.

Four metropolitan areas with teams have lost population since 2000. Two are Cleveland Pittsburgh, which have just built new stadiums, so they’re not going anywhere. But the others are New Orleans and Buffalo, with unique situations.

New Orleans has lost over 20 percent of its population, primarily due to Katrina. Tom Benson has connections to San Antonio. He’s over 80 years old. And over half the surrounding area in New Orleans is covered by water, which makes drawing new fans difficult. Not hard to see where this is leading, is it?

Buffalo’s a different story. All of upstate New York has been losing population steadily over the last 30 years or so – Buffalo, Rochester, Syracuse, Utica. (And it’s over 200 miles from Buffalo to Utica, which means you don’t have many fans driving across the state for a game. Albany’s gained population, but it’s 290 miles from Albany to Buffalo.) The region is quite depressed economically – many of the businesses that lined cities along the Eric Canal are long one. The Bills play in a pretty old and outdated stadium. And Ralph Wilson is 90 years old. (Maybe it’s not a different story after all.)

The Bills are playing one game every year in Toronto – which has a metropolitan area of over six million people and is an hour and 45 minutes away from Buffalo. If the team moves, it could still hold much of its existing fan base.

Just don't be surprised when it happens.

Football Update

2009-03-04T19:16:45Z

Kurt Warner is apparently signed, sealed, and delivered to the Cardinals. (They haven't made an announcement yet, but when the agent says he's signed, that's usually the case, unless your agent is named Boras.)

This column was written before the above announcement, which makes it even more valid: the 49ers were taken to the cleaners on this. An important point in there: if the Niners want to set up a smash-mouth ball-control offense, Kurt Warner ain't the guy to get you there.

So, unless the Broncos decide to dangle Jay Cutler again (don't know what they were thinking), don't look for any major QB moves until the draft. Which should shut Bears and Jets fans up for awhile.

Baseball Update

2009-03-03T17:37:47Z

Jim Bowden leaving the Washington Nationals – whether he fell or was pushed – is the best thing that could have happened to that franchise, which may have been in danger of becoming a black hole. Bowden was famous, both here and in Cincinnati, for picking up corner guys and first basemen, and not paying attention to other needs, especially the pitching staff. When he got fired from Cincinnati, the place was a mess (Dave O’Brien’s tenure didn’t help, but Wayne Krivsky and Walt Jocketty have been turning things around, to the point where they may be a factor this year), and Washington is the same – that’s not exactly a stellar track record. It’ll take awhile to right the ship, but it’ll get done – D.C. wants a winning baseball team so badly, they’ll probably put up with quite a bit.

*****

Bobby Crosby wants out of Oakland given they’re bringing in Orlando Cabrera. He’s lucky he has a job. He played 145 games last year (only his second season in five he’s played more than 100), and finished with an OPS under .650 for the third year in a row. I don’t know what he’s making this year, but last year he got $3.5 million. Cabrera will make $4 million this year with the A’s, hasn’t played less than 141 games since 2000, and hasn’t had an OPS below .650 since his 16-game break-in year of 1997. I don’t have any idea who will want Crosby, but the A’s are making the right move.

Listening to the Cubs' Game Thursday

2009-03-01T01:37:48Z

Listening to a spring training game is a great insomnia cure. The announcers are relaxed, you’re not following the game that carefully, and if you’re not paying attention, you’ll be catching some Zs. I’ve done so each of the last two games; yesterday’s opener and today. Unfortunately, I was listening to the games at work at the time.

The Cubs have a left-handed hitter named Michael Hoffpauir who could be the solution to some of their problems. It was thought last year that their lineup was too heavily right-handed, and that they struggled against strong right-handed pitchers. Accordingly, they picked up Milton Bradley (good) and traded Mark DeRosa to make room for Aaron Miles (bad). Hoffpauir could work his way in to the lineup – if the guys he was replacing weren’t high-priced stars Derrek Lee and Alfonso Soriano. But he can definitely mash righties, so the Cubs might be wise to pick a few spots.

*****

Pat Hughes: “The team we have not discussed this year – the Pittsburgh Pirates.”
Ron Santo: (pause) “I mean, what can you say?”

*****

Mike Stanton pitched the last inning for the Cubs, giving up a run on a solo homer. Stanton’s been around awhile – he broke in with Atlanta in 1989 – and is trying to win a job, at age 41, in the Cubs’ bullpen after being out of the game for a year. I have to admit, it would be tempting to stick around for a few years in the bullpen. I’ve seen some players who just won’t go away – Steve Carlton, for example, stuck it out for over two years after he started going downhill and pitched with five teams, and Graig Nettles bounced from San Diego to Atlanta to Montreal as a pinch hitter, because he’d had some financial setbacks and needed the money.

Stanton was out of baseball in 2008 after a pretty awful 2007 (although he had previously signed a two-year contract with Cincinnati, so they were still on the hook for paying him). He may have picked a bad team to latch on with – the Cubs’ bullpen is particularly deep. Still, he might be effective facing the occasional lefty.

*****

Last year, I had radio broadcasts of ball games via MLB’s online service. It wasn’t a bad deal during spring training on weekends, but during the regular season, I rarely used it. This year, I think I’m going to do without. As it is, I can usually pick up the games from three teams (Cubs, White Sox, and Brewers on a good day), plus with cable, there’s ESPN, TBS, and the Cubs and White Sox wherever they’re airing. (My cable system has yet to offer the MLB network.)

I do get a bit sick of the choices made on television – it seems the Yankees are on a disproportionate amount to the other teams – and I do enjoy seeing other teams. I particularly remember a 1987 game that aired on NBC, back when they still had the Game of the Week – I thought it was the White Sox and Tigers, but a check of baseballreference.com yields White Sox vs. Red Sox, at the old Comiskey Park. The White Sox had switched uniforms (the Sox had six different uniform designs between 1964 and 1990, not counting their current one, which has stuck ever since); at that point the only way I’d see a uniform design was on television or baseball cards. But the White Sox were never on television – and I sat down in my hotel room to watch the game, a 3-2 10-inning thriller.

There are so many games on TV now that they all blend together a bit. And with both the NL and AL represented (having lived in the Chicago and New York areas, I doubt I could handle anything else), I should be able to see or listen to almost every team.

*****

Cubs win, bringing them to 2-0 in the exhibition season. Not that the record matters.

Clips o' the Day!

2009-01-31T18:22:11Z

Surprisingly, the most similar show to Friends isn't on the networks, it's on the Cartoon Network. 6Teen is about six 16-year-olds who hang out together... in a mall. It's Canadian (I could tell that before the credits, when one episode had hot celebrities listed and the first one they came up with was Elisha Cuthbert), and surprisingly funny. Only two of the characters have direct parallels to Friends characters, it's multiracial (one black, one Hispanic, one Asian), and it's almost realistic.

Here's the first portion of the pilot, which plays more like Friends than anything else:

By the way, this has to run on the Cartoon Network. The age group is too old for Nickelodeon, and given The Disney Network won't even let their teen characters drink coffee, I'm pretty sure a scene like this wouldn't pass muster:

Moonlighting Reunion

2009-01-14T16:16:19Z

Could happen, says TV Squad.

Don't expect them to look like they did 25 years ago, that's for sure. If Glenn Gordon Caron is on board, though, it would be worth watching -- he wasn't involved the last season of the show (which I rarely watched), although he was the one who created the Maddie-gets-pregnant-and-marries-a-stranger story arc that really threw the show off the rails.

Clip o' the Day!

2009-01-06T02:40:26Z

The older I get, the more I appreciate The Carol Burnett Show, which was a combination of great talent (Burnett, Harvey Korman, great guest stars) and a little luck (Vicki Lawrence was added to the cast at age 18 based simply on her resemblance to Burnett -- what if it had turned out she had no talent?). There was also some long-term genius -- rather than trying to rerun the show straight (in an era when no one wanted hour-long syndie reruns), they cut the episodes down to a half-hour of just the comedy, thus ridding themselves of the music rights problems that have plagued almost every variety show. (Could you imagine cutting the music out of Donny & Marie? I mean, how many purple socks jokes do you want to hear?)

I know Lorne Michaels never wanted SNL to be like Burnett's show (especially with the actors cracking up), but with SNL being Live, that was never an issue. (Burnett's show taped twice -- the dress rehearsal and the actual show with an audience, and they picked the funniest version.)

Here's a blooper reel. Don't play it at work, there are few expletives.

Clip o' the Day!

2009-01-03T05:02:51Z

After ABC found some success with Bewitched in 1964, NBC got going in the magic-hot-babe business a year later with I Dream of Jeannie. Their only rule when casting is don't make the lead a blonde like Elizabeth Montgomery -- and then they cast a lead who looked exactly like Elizabeth Montgomery.

The first year doesn't rerun much anymore (mostly because it's in black and white), but it's a little more fun to watch than the others. (I hesitate to use "realistic," but the rest of the episodes are like watching a long episode of Three's Company.) So here's one -- with Paul Frees (who worked with about every animation company at the time) doing the voiceover explaining the setup, which was used for the first six episodes.

Watch i dream of jeannie 1.3 in Funny Videos | View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

Bowl Game, Anybody?

2008-12-31T04:41:32Z

Just caught my eye on StubHub.com -- Music City Bowl tickets, for the game tomorrow, start at 25 cents.

I'd be there. Too bad there are no bowl games in Chicagoland.

Jets Followup

2008-12-29T16:40:48Z

Yep, he gone. (Eric Mangini, that is.)

Let's see who's next in the Cavalcade of Jet Coaches. Just remember, this is a team that once fired Pete Carroll so they could hire Rich Kotite.

Back in Illinois

2008-12-29T04:45:55Z

Never thought I'd be able to drive the whole way from Columbia, MD to Naperville -- taking the southern route, which adds about 60 miles -- in less than 14 hours. But I did.

Awful football day. Jets lost, they're out, and I'd better see Eric Mangini and Mike Tannenbaum fired within the week. The Favre move completely backfired, Vernon Gholston was a bust, and the team collapsed down the stretch. Kellen Clemens lost a year sitting on the bench, and Chad Pennington will be the NFL MVP. Starting over again.

The Bears lost, but their season wasn't awful. I don't think I'd have predicted 9-7 early on. A near miss.

Giants lost, but they're the #1 seed.

And Northern Illinois just lost in the Independence Bowl.

Good night, everybody!